so don't forget me or what you want

Plans by Birds of Tokyo

'We made plans to kiss the sun at night.'

How did I get here?

The reality of leaving high school forever is finally sinking in. It's both a scary yet thrilling experience simultaneously. No more would the sheltering be there anymore and off we venture into the real world where school will no longer be our primary preoccupation. 13 years of schooling have all condensed to this one day, this final day of walking out of the gates of St George as its students. Sure we'll be back for the HSC and signing out, but it will be different. Parting is such a sweet sweet sorrow, but we all knew that this was coming, didn't we?

I didn't cry at my graduation. Yet I know I am very sad. I'll miss St George, even though I didn't like it very much for a long time. But I've grown up there and leave the place with fond memories. Ah, 6 years of being stuck in Kogarah. 6 years of my life which I'll treasure. So long St George Class of 2010, you've been good. May each and every one of you venture into fields that you love and perhaps, at our reunions we could share stories of success and happiness. All the best girls and Good Riddance.

this is like a flashback

I went to the physiotherapist yesterday since I've been experiencing pains in my neck for the past 3 weeks. Bad idea, I know...to be only seeking professional help when the pain became unbearable. Anyhow, the physiotherapist was great! He targeted the painful muscles of my neck and gave me massages, to help soothe that area etc. Oh...and he did some weird stretches on my back, cracking my bones and all that...IT HURT BUT IT FELT SO GOOD.

ANYWAY, I woke up this morning feeling IMMENSE pain on my back. I guess its my muscles...because I don't ever exercise them. This post makes no sense. I hate English.

I like lazy Sundays...

The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out

This video captures my world; lights + lights everywhere.

Florence and The Machine's Cosmic Love.

Old People

Year 12; we've reached the end of the schooling ladder. This long gruelling race that we've run since 1998 is finally coming to an end. How do you feel? Relieved? Sad? Sentimental? We close an old chapter of our lives and open a realm of clean slates where we prepare to write new things into our somewhat short yet sweet lives of ours. It's hard not to feel old and mature at this age, being the kings and queens of high school. Yet on the grand spectrum of things, we're only tiny little butterflies only starting to take their first flight into the atmosphere of freedom.
In so many ways, I still feel like a 5 year old child. I'm not mature at all nor am I ready and I'm not gonna pretend I am.

Countdown (Sick for the Big Sun) by Phoenix
do you remember when 21 years was old?

Yesterday

Yesterday was my last day with my maths teacher at school and now, she's probably up in the air flying off to Europe to holiday. It's been a mere 1.75 years with her and oh how fast time has flown by. I can recall my initial thoughts of leaving high school and there wasn't a feeling of sadness within me as I am in fact, a little more than excited to leaving. But my maths teacher is different, she's someone so great, amazing and dedicated. She'll probably be the teacher I'll miss the most from high school. Oh, and did I mention that she's so loveable as well? I feel like tearing a little, knowing that yesterday was my last lesson with her. I'll really miss her and I hope that she will remember us year 12s of 2010.

The Sharpness of Death

Death - why be like so?

As I come across countless articles and news sources documenting recent deaths, I can't help but think that the luckiest of all deaths would be to die of old age, knowing that death is imminent. And what moves me the most are the sudden deaths, those of which cannot be predicted and occur out of the blue. Like those deaths of the tourists in the Philippines, like those ones in Earthquakes, like those killed as bystanders...it's so unfortunate. They all never knew they were going to die, that brushing their teeth, eating food, waking up to the morning sun and all these minor petty things would've been their lasts on Earth. How many families would have been wrecked? Earlier in the evening, a cop was shot in the head during a raid in Bankstown. I don't know of his condition, but I do hope that he is strong and pulling through. I don't want today to be his last day on Earth. I don't want today to be his last day waking up, brushing his teeth, driving off, eating......... the list goes on.

And with regard to the title? I don't even know why I named this post as 'The Sharpness of Death'...it just feels appropriate.

I don't even know

I don't know how people can be so happy all the time. Smile, says everyone.

Have I actually smiled genuinely lately? I can't recall the last time I did so.

It's bad to be unhappy all the time, but that's all I know how to feel. Feeling happy is not something I'm familiar with. And high school in a nutshell? I've felt 40% Happy and 60% Unhappy..most of the time. That's what these 6 years have really felt like. I feel sick, I don't want to do anything. I just want to sleep.

All summer drinkin water, trying to keep your eyes dry

This is the sound of what summer's spose to be.
The summer this year will be amazing...and the first obstacle of course is the HSC. Can't wait till post HSC.

You are the ever-living ghost of what once was

No One's Gonna Love You by Band of Horses

Kids are growing up way too quickly nowadays. As usual, I caught the train home today since I didn't feel like catching the bus. The train stops at Kingsgrove and in comes a bunch of girls from a nearby school along with a year 9/10 tech kid who was carrying a bag of one of those girls. The first thought that crossed my mind was, 'Wow, what a nice brother for carrying his sister's bag and waiting for the train with her' and I immediately felt touched and somewhat jealous of the sibling love that seemed to exist between the two. However, the pair sat down and the boy, whom I assumed to be the brother, started to place his arm around the girl and dug his head into her neck. You can only imagine my horror...how could I have mistaken a young pre-pubescent/sexually excited couple as brother and sister? Honestly speaking, the girl looked like she was in year 7, with baby fat on her cheeks and a lopsided pony tail which made her look like an innocent little girl. And the boy? Oh he looked much older than her and was the sole reason why I had mistaken them to be brother and sister.

Anyhow, it seemed as though they couldn't really control their hormonal/sexual desires and thus, started a make out show in front of me (not directly....they sat diagonally away from me). What the FUCK? The boy started to lick her....perhaps trying to give the girl hickeys or some shit, I don't really care. My horror quickly dissolved into laughter and I really struggled not to laugh at their faces in case some of their bodily fluids would get onto me....(not really. but you know, these kids nowadays can do ANYTHING...right?) Gross. The boy also had pimples on his face...so little girl, you probably have pus on your face.

Perhaps they should stay home and really get a room.

Galaxy

Joshua Tree Under the Milky Way from Henry Jun Wah Lee on Vimeo.

the beautiful and ethereal sounds of sigur ros' music compliment the views of the brilliant star swept night so well.